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Anal Sex 101

Anal sex and anal play are wonderful ways to spice things up in the bedroom! Why? It feels good! This area of the body is rich with sensory nerve endings and pleasure points, which can lead to incredible orgasms.

Who has anal sex?

Everyone! Straight, gay, men, women, couples, and singles.

In a person with a penis, penetration stimulates the prostate, which can result in a deeper, more intense and longer-lasting P-spot orgasms. To stimulate the prostate, put a finger in and bend toward the stomach. 

In a person with a vulva, the clitoris is estimated to have 8000 sensory nerve endings and some of those nerve endings reach as far as the anus. In addition to the shared connection of sensory nerves, a thin membrane is all that separates the vaginal cavity from the rectal cavity. Therefore, direct stimulation of the G-spot or clitoris during anal sex helps some women achieve orgasm.

Some tips about anal play:

    • Everyone thinks that anal play involves penetration, but it doesn’t have to. One can touch the anal opening with a finger while masturbating or stimulating their partner’s anus during intercourse or oral sex. The outside of the anus has many extra sensitive nerve endings. Touch or rubbing it, will feel very good.
    • It should NEVER hurt, if done properly. Everyone has 2 sphincters: the outside sphincter, which you control and the inside sphincter which is further inside your body and you have less control of. Pain occurs when the partner does not wait for these muscles to relax. 
    • It does not make straight men gay. Sexual orientation is about who you do the act with not what kind of act you do. Many men enjoy the insertion of a vibrator or dildo beyond the anal opening and short anal canal into the larger rectum. Read more about what is a prostate massage and it's benefits.
    • His erection may get softer with anal penetration. That’s quite common since the pelvic floor muscles need to relax to allow an object to go inside.
    • Oral anal sex is called rimming. If you enjoy this, please be sure to use a dental dam, a latex barrier between your mouth and anus, to stay safe.
    • Pegging is when a woman penetrates a man’s anus usually while wearing a strap-on dildo with a harness.

How to have great anal sex:

    • Genuinely want it - It's your body and your rules. Period.
    • Relax your body
    • Go slow
    • Start small
    • Communicate
    • Use a lot of (thicker) anal lubricant
    • Listen to your body 
    • Listen to your partner
    • Never go from anal play to vaginal or oral play without changing condoms or washing up
    • Always wear a condom. The anal cavity easily tears and you are at the highest risk for STIs.
    • Go to the bathroom a few hours beforehand. 

What makes a great 1st time anal sex toy?

    • Small and slender (then work your way up)
    • Smooth surface
    • Vibration is fun and helps to relax
    • Non-porous


What are the different types of anal sex toys?



Luxury dildos can be used as anal toys so long as they have a flared base. They are meant to move back and forth to achieve orgasm, but are not hands free. Dildos can be used with a hand or a harness. (If using a harness, make sure it is at least six inches long and has a flared base so that it stays put in the harness ring.)They are available in a wide variety of sizes, materials, textures, and colors.

Smoother dildos are best for anal play. For beginners, silicone dildos are recommended since they are more flexible.


Buy Luxury Dildos



Butt plugs

Butt plugs are meant to stay put thanks to the anal muscles gripping the neck of the toy. These anal toys create a sensation of fullness without having to move it back-and-forth. They have a small narrow neck that expands to a flared base.

During orgasm, anal muscles contract along with the muscles of the vagina or penis. Therefore, plugs intensify pleasure. Since the wall between the vagina and rectum is thin, many women like to use plugs during sex.

Butt plug sizes range from about the size of a pinky finger to a fist and are available in silicone, glass & metal.


See our list of the Top 5 Best Butt Plugs


Anal Beads

are a string of beads that graduate in size and are pulled out when close to orgasm. They stimulate the anal opening as it opens and closes around each bead. This feeling can induce orgasm or the removal of beads during orgasm makes the orgasm even better.


Buy Anal Beads



Prostate Massagers and Stimulators

These sex toys for men are specifically designed to massage the prostate. Some prostrate massagers vibrate for an added sensation. 


See our list of the Top 5 Best Prostate Massagers




Final Thoughts

Anal sex is a common sexual activity for people of all genders and sexualities. Anal play and penetration can be pleasurable for everyone! So, if you are ready to explore anal play, we hope you now have all of the important health and safety information you need for a pleasurable experience.


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