How to Introduce Anal Sex and the Best Anal Sex Toys

How to Introduce Anal Sex and the Best Anal Sex Toys

Posted by Sexual Health Educator on 9th Dec 2020

Learn how to introduce anal sex to your partner and which are the best anal sex toys to use from sexual health educators.


Learn how to introduce anal sex to your partner and which are the best anal sex toys to use from sexual health educators.

How to Introduce Anal Sex

Best Anal Sex Toys

This post was last updated on December 9, 2020 at 4:52 p.m.

For many people, not agreeing to anal is more of a mental stumbling block than anything else. They are either self-conscious or are religiously conflicted about it. If you press your partner into an experience that turns out unpleasant or uncomfortable, say goodbye to anal. Communicate, listen and take it very, very slowly and (back) doors will open!

Things to Remember First About Anal Sex


It is very wise to be prepared with anal lubricant, which is thicker than regular lubricant. Anal lube stays on the skin longer providing a more comfortable feeling by reducing friction and sensation. Our favorite is Sliquid Sassy.

How to Introduce Anal

When introducing anal please remember that what you see in porn is not real! Please remember to be gentle so that the experience is pleasurable for the receiver!

  1. Get your partner really excited. That way, they won't be worrying about what will happen next.
  2. Using fingers first is a good way to get your partner comfortable with the idea of anal. Start with a single finger, maybe your pinky finger. On a woman, with her permission ahead of time, try stimulating her clitoris and very slowly insert your well-lubed finger while still performing oral.
  3. After your partner is comfortable with a finger or two, you might want to try an anal toy or rubbing the penis against the anus. If experimenting with the penis, the next time, you could try a little actual penetration and the next time, even more, penetration until the penis is fully inside the anus.

Why Is Anal Sex Enjoyable for Women?

The anus shares a wall with the vaginal cavity. So anal penetration not only stimulates the cervix (encouraging deep orgasm), at certain angles, it also stimulates the G-spot. Either way, the combination of stimulating the clitoris and the anus generally creates a more intense orgasm, which will be very appreciated!

What Is Rimming?

If everyone is comfortable, you could try licking the butt and oral stimulation of the anus, which is called rimming, aka analingus. Start this in the shower so that everyone feels clean. Rimming can be very erotic and is something new for you to explore.

What Are Anal Beads?

Anal beads are a string of beads that graduate in size and are pulled out when close to orgasm. They stimulate the anal opening as it opens and closes around each bead. This feeling can induce orgasm or the removal of beads during orgasm makes the orgasm even better.

How to use anal beads: Lubricate yourself and the anal beads, then insert the first bead slowly and gently. You can then insert each bead slowly until you’ve taken as much as you are comfortable with. Anal beads can be pleasurable when left in during sex or masturbation. Another way anal beads can be pleasurable is at the beginning of an orgasm. When starting to orgasm, the beads can be pulled out one at a time during orgasm making the orgasm even better.

What Are the Best Anal Sex Toys?

Best Beginner Anal Sex Toys

You are a beginner if you have never used an anal toy, or have only used small anal toys or a finger for anal penetration. Stick with something simple and lightweight that is either silicone or hard plastic. Try a toy that has a diameter of approximately 0-1". You could also try anal beads since the beads graduate in size and you can use as much of the toy as you feel comfortable.

Best Intermediate Anal Sex Toys

If you have had previous experience with smaller anal toys are ready to graduate to something bigger. It's recommended that you choose a toy that is approximately 1-1.5" in diameter.

If you haven't already done so, now might be the time to introduce heavier materials like glass, stainless steel or wood. You could also introduce some texture or vibration.

Best Advanced Anal Sex Toys

More advanced anal users want something large with a diameter at least 1.5" or more. You could also try anal beads or something very different with 3 different points of vibration or with 2 rotating beads inside the toy

Final Thoughts . . .

Anal stimulation is fun and very pleasurable and can improve both solo and partner play. While it might not be for everyone, you'll never know if anal sex it's right for you and your lover until you try it!